


The Divide

by somekindofwildgirl



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Drama & Romance, F/M, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Healing, Post-Battle of Hogwarts, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Post-War, Recovery, Romance, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-01
Updated: 2019-06-30
Packaged: 2020-04-06 05:59:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 14,719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19056640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/somekindofwildgirl/pseuds/somekindofwildgirl
Summary: Daphne Greengrass prided herself on keeping a low profile. That changed the moment Harry Potter came crashing into her life.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story isn't planned. There isn't going to be a schedule. I'm rolling them out as soon as I finish them. I'm working on an original novel right now and this is going to be my escape from that. I also have a lot of questions about life right now. The war happened, but how did the characters we fell in love with recover from that? What changed? And what stayed the same?
> 
> Thank you for joining me on this journey. See you on the other side?

**Chapter 1**

The sight of the Hogwarts Express filled her with dread. The scarlet engine waited at the platform, ready to take another batch of students to the magical school. Gone were the days where it represented safety, _home_. As Daphne looked around the platform at King's Cross, she noticed the sombre mood. No one raised their voice. Little children clutched their mother's hand as the women stared at the train, tears in their eyes. The students pushed their trollies to the train as if going to a funeral.

The observation wasn't wrong. The Final Battle was fought at Hogwarts. It didn't matter which side you were on. She would bet her entire vault that every student knew someone who had died on the battlefield. They were being forced to return to the place of their nightmares, Ministry mandated.

"Be safe," her mother whispered into her blonde hair as Daphne hugged her goodbye. She tried to memorize the comforting scent of vanilla before releasing her mum. The absence of her father felt more acute here. But she would not dwell on it. Refused to.

Daphne tried to smile. "Of course."

"Watch out for each other," she said to both sisters.

"We will," Astoria answered that time, stepping into her mother for a hug.

Daphne grabbed her trunk and with a last look at her mum, she boarded the Hogwarts Express. Her sister was right behind her. Though Astoria was two years younger than her, the two had grown close following the war. It was a relief having her at her side, so she didn't have to face this alone. Though the two didn't look like sisters. They were often compared to Bellatrix and Narcissa. Astoria resembled their mother with her long, dark hair and dark green eyes. Daphne was blonde, blue-eyed like their father.

Nothing could have prepared her for boarding the train. It had always been chaos. Children running across the aisle, wands out after a summer of no magic. People shouting at each other about summer plans and the latest rumours. It was madness. It was innocence. Their childhood had slipped out of their fingers like sand. No matter how hard she tried to hold on to hers, it was futile.

She felt self-conscious of rolling her school trunk down the aisle. The silence was overbearing. The sound of her footsteps echoed down the train, causing people to turn and look at her. Daphne wasn't used to the attention. She had always been a wallflower. She was known as the pretty Slytherin girl and that was enough for her.

Fear was present in every gaze she met. It was disconcerting to see people so open with their emotions. Daphne hurried on until she found an empty compartment. Their feelings were contagious and it was too much. The grief was still fresh for everyone. They had all lost someone in the war and she couldn't help but think that going back to Hogwarts was a terrible idea. They weren't ready. Maybe they'd never be ready.

With a wave of her wand, Daphne carefully put her and Astoria's trunk away. Neither sister said a word. There was comfort in their silence, so different from the quiet train. They were away from the world for a moment. Every day she was grateful that her sister had made it through the war unscathed. The sacrifices Daphne had made had been worth it.

Pansy stormed into their compartment, the compartment door slamming behind her. "What's wrong with everyone? It's like someone died."

That was Daphne's best friend in a nutshell. Leave it to her to be unsympathetic while the world was still grieving.

"Going back to Hogwarts isn't easy," Astoria snapped. "You should show some compassion."

"So we can wallow in grief? The world is moving on and we should move on with it," Pansy said.

Astoria quickly said goodbye and left the compartment. Daphne wasn't surprised. Her best friend and sister couldn't stand each other. They rarely lasted longer than a couple of minutes in each other's presence. Pansy thought Astoria was too sensitive. Her sister believed the other witch to be selfish. Daphne had tried to get them at least somewhat civil, but her efforts had been fruitless. It just wasn't meant to be. She'd have an easier time getting Draco and Potter to get along.

"What's her problem?" Pansy said, taking the seat across from her.

She sighed. "Don't start."

"Am I the only one looking forward to returning back to school?"

"Probably. If I never had to go back to Hogwarts, it'd be too soon."

Pansy rolled her blue eyes. "Bad things happened there, but it was also our home first. I'm not going to let anyone take that away from me."

"Can we not talk about the war?"

"Why not?" She asked. "The war happened. Everyone's trying to act like it didn't and I'm sick of it. How can we move past it if we don't talk about it?"

"Pansy, leave it," Blaise Zabini said joining them. Theodore Nott followed closely behind. "Have you seen Draco?"

The girls shook their head. The boys flopped on the seats, Blaise next to Pansy and Theo next to her. Daphne smiled as she looked at her friends. A year ago, she never would have pictured this. It had seemed foolish to hope that they would be alive at the end of it all and impossible to return to Hogwarts. But here they were.

Daphne rested her head on Theo's bony shoulder. "I'm happy to see you."

"How was your summer?" He asked, wrapping his arm around her.

"Alright," she said. "Yours?"

"Alright."

They both knew their answers were a lie. None of them had met up during the summer. The only time their paths crossed was at the funerals they attended. Their lives were put on hold while the Ministry ransacked their houses and put their families on trial. Survival was the name of the game.

It wasn't long before Draco joined them, a thunderous look on his face. He threw his trunk on the rack and sat next to Blaise. "I can't believe I have to return to this shithole."

"Nice to see you too, mate," Blaise said.

Daphne wanted to groan. It was too early for this. She often wondered how the two men were still alive. Draco had always been a bit conceited and self-involved. Blaise had made it his mission to be the constant thorn in the blond's side. How Draco hadn't killed him was a mystery. Yet, they were best friends. Not that the two men would ever use those words.

"What happened?" Pansy asked.

"The regular bullshit. For being the fucking 'light' side," Draco said using his fingers to emphasize the words, "they're fucking brutal."

Theo sighed. He took off his glasses and cleaned the lenses with his shirt. "It's going to be a long year."

"You too?" Draco asked.

He nodded.

"What am I missing?" Daphne asked.

Blaise winced. "The shit Draco doled out for the past seven years is going to come back tenfold."

She could almost taste her fear at his words. The boys didn't have to explain further. Draco's trial had been a public affair. Everyone was privy to all his dirty laundry. There were no skeletons in his closet. No secrets left. The Ministry had stripped Draco bare - all the Death Eaters and their families went through this - until there was nothing left. The Malfoy name was now tainted. Though it was Lucius's fault, not Draco's, in Daphne's opinion.

Everyone in this compartment had fallen from grace. They were being judged by everyone and it fell on the younger generation to pull their family reputation from the ashes. They were only eighteen years old. It was too much to ask.

"It's not fair," Daphne said, though she felt naive saying it. "There's a reason we're not in Azkaban. We were proven innocent."

"Good luck with that, Daph," Blaise snorted, though his dark eyes were sympathetic. "Prepare to have Death Eater whore thrown your way. Returning to Hogwarts is our sentence for being born to terrible fathers."

Draco pinched the bridge of his nose. "Where's the firewhisky?"

"At least we're together," Pansy said firmly. "We'll get through this."

If anyone disagreed, they knew better than to voice it. Daphne stared at the passing landscape, letting the motion of the train soothe her. She hoped that her friends were wrong. But the blonde knew that they were right. Returning to Hogwarts was going to be difficult for everyone and her and her friends were probably going to suffer for it.

May Merlin be with them.


	2. Chapter 2

Daphne woke up with a gasp as her nightmare faded away, the rising sun banishing it to the recesses of her mind. It was the same dream again. Curses lit up the sky as she and Astoria dodged them. The Death Eaters moved gracefully in the shadows, skirting the centuries-old trees. It was a game of cat and mouse. Her terror rose like bile in her throat, so potent she could still taste its bitterness. She could see the edge of the Forbidden Forest. If they made it, they would be safe.

And like every night she had this dream, Astoria tripped and fell. Daphne tried to run to her, to get her, but the Death Eaters always got there first.

She pulled her shirt up to wipe her sweaty brow. Her blonde hair clung to her face and she knew that she looked like a mess. How could she not? Every night, Daphne watched her sister die at the hands of those who had always promised to protect them.

Jumping out of bed, she grabbed her toiletries bag and headed to the bathroom. The other girls were still asleep, but it wouldn't be long before they were awake.

The hot water felt heavenly against her skin. The heat seared away the fear and grief that still clung to her from her nightmare. Daphne never told anyone about her dreams. Everyone had nightmares. How could they not after everything they'd been through? Others had it far worse than she did. She threw her clothes on, grabbed her book bag and left for the Great Hall.

It was too early for the other students to be awake. Even the portraits were still slumbering. These were the moments that she could pretend the war had never happened. The sunlight cast the stone walls in a golden light, making Hogwarts look like magic itself. As if nothing bad could ever happen here. This place had always filled her with wonder and joy. But, the effect was always ruined the moment she reached the Great Hall. If she closed her blue eyes, Daphne could still see the broken bodies - the injured and the dead - brought together in this room. It was where she waited for Astoria, hoping that her sister was still alive.

"Are you going in or staying out?"

Daphne was snapped out of her thoughts and came face to face with Harry Potter, the Boy-Who-Won. It was the first time they'd seen each other up close. Potter was Draco's sworn enemy. Associating with him would have been social suicide. But as she looked up at him, he didn't look like a man who had saved the world from tyranny.

He looked just like everyone else.

In the past, a cloak of destiny was wrapped around him, making him look otherworldly. But now that it was gone, Potter seemed different. Less certain of himself. His black hair was still a mess, but his green eyes looked like they belonged to someone far older than him. He still wore those ridiculous wire-rimmed glasses.

Realizing that she had been staring, Daphne cleared her throat. "I just wanted to say thank you. The world is a safer place because of you. There's nothing that we can do to repay you for it."

Before Potter could answer, Daphne turned around and fled to the Slytherin table. She could see that he still stood in the doorway. It was likely he had no idea who she was. It was better that way. If Draco or Pansy found out, Daphne would never hear the end of it. Not that they scared her. It just wasn't worth the effort to fight them.

Weasley and Granger joined Potter at the doors and the trio walked to the Gryffindor table together. They looked formidable. Weasley towered over the other two. He was frowning, his gaze lethal whenever he looked at the Slytherin table. He made it very clear that he was against returning to Hogwarts. Granger's hair was still a bushy mass of curls that almost devoured her face. But she had grown into herself since the war, held herself confidently. She didn't shy away from the looks she drew. Rumour had it that Granger and Weasley were a couple now, though it didn't look that way from where she was sitting.

"I'm surprised to see you up so early," Millicent said taking the seat across from her.

Daphne shrugged, grabbing porridge and berries. "I didn't eat enough at dinner yesterday and I woke up starving."

"I still can't believe that Weasley left in the middle of McGonagall's welcome speech."

It was the talk of the school. McGonagall gave the typical lecture about house unity and healing. Weasley stood up in the middle of her speech, glared at her, and walked out. If that hadn't been shocking enough, a handful of people had copied him. Weasley made a statement. But, Granger and Potter hadn't supported him.

"What are we talking about?" Blaise asked.

"Weasley," Daphne said between bites.

He rolled his eyes. "They'll let him get away with anything now that he's a war hero."

"A lot of people aren't happy about returning to Hogwarts," Millicent said. "I doubt anyone would have returned if the Ministry hadn't forced us back."

Astoria chimed in, making Daphne wonder how she hadn't noticed her sister's arrival. "I can't believe they're making us re-do our previous year. Now I have to relive OWLs all over again."

Daphne felt a surge of affection for her sister's innocence. Maybe there was hope for the younger generation after all. The group was quiet as they ate. The Great Hall was filling up. Professor Slughorn handed out their schedules just as the owls carrying the daily post flew through the hall.

Millicent flipped through The Daily Prophet and frowned. She handed the paper around the group so that they could each read one of the articles. It looked like Weasley was looking for a fight, if the interview was anything to go by.

'The only reason I'm back at Hogwarts is that the Ministry has forced us to return. I would never willingly agree to sit in a school filled with Death Eaters. To see them walk right where my brother died is an insult to his memory.'

"He's talking about us," Millicent said.

Blaise swore. "I don't know why we bothered coming back. Draco was the only one involved in that shit."

"Because we were also forced to return," she said.

"Draco wasn't the only one," Daphne said looking down at her plate. "Or do you not remember our last 'school' year. We're all guilty of something."

Thankfully, Slughorn chose that moment to hand them their schedules. Blaise looked like he was about to argue, but she ignored him and scanned her schedule. Now that they had progressed to the NEWTs level, the classes were a mix of all four houses. Daphne had decided to take the following classes: NEWT-level Charms, Transfiguration, Ancient Runes, Herbology, Astronomy, Defence Against the Dark Arts, and History of Magic.

"I'm going to head to class. I'll see you guys at lunch," Daphne said, grabbing her bag.

The look Blaise shot her told her that their conversation wasn't over. Not by a long shot.

#

The first day of classes was harder than Daphne had anticipated. Being back in the castle wore on her. Memories she'd rather forget filled every inch of the school. As soon as she finished her assignments with Pansy, she excused herself. Daphne needed to get away. Leaving her bag behind, she grabbed her cloak and left the common room. The hallway grew busier the closer she got to the main doors. She got caught behind a slow group that was holding everyone up. Granger was standing in front of her talking to another girl.

"Harry's avoiding me," the Weasley girl said, her voice loud.

Granger sighed. "Give him some time, Ginny. This summer has been hard on him. He's grieving."

"We're all grieving! We broke up because it wasn't safe," Weasley said. "The war is over. It's safe. So why won't he talk to me?"

"You know that I can't get involved. I'm sorry."

Daphne was relieved when she passed them. It wasn't proper to talk about such personal things out in public where anyone could hear. Hadn't Weasley noticed that everyone was listening to them? Any mention of Potter's name was going to do that.

It wasn't until Daphne had reached the Black Lake that she realized her spot was already taken. Draco had been absent for most of the day. He attended classes but didn't take part and he had missed every meal that day.

She could understand Pansy's obsession with him. Draco looked almost ethereal in the moonlight. His blonde hair was almost white and his skin was so pale he looked like a Greek statue. Though he was attractive, there was turbulence in those beautiful grey eyes. He hadn't had the best of childhoods - none of them had - and the war had made him even more troubled.

Daphne sat next to him. He didn't seem to notice her, which was fine by her. The lake was still this evening. Though the weather was still warm, the wind carried an autumn chill.

"I'm never going to escape what I did, am I?" Draco asked.

She swallowed. "I don't know."

"Weasley was right. I shouldn't have been allowed back here after what I did."

"We all did terrible things to survive."

"No one else became a Death Eater."

Daphne huffed. "Just because we weren't branded doesn't mean that we weren't forced to do bad things. What did you think going to school was like with the Carrows in charge?" she asked. "If you wanted someone to say 'Poor Draco', talk to Pansy."

An awkward silence drifted between them. Daphne knew that he was hurting. Draco had done awful things. He had been a bully before a Death Eater, but she couldn't hate him. The blond had always come to her defence. He was always there for her when she needed him. They didn't spend that much time together or talk a lot, but it was the little moments they shared. There was a bond there that she didn't have with anyone else.

"How bad was it?"

Daphne bit her lip, trying to choose her words carefully. "There are no words to describe it. I've never felt more helpless or disgusted in my life."

"Disgusted?"

"We all had to find a way to survive."

He wrapped an arm around her. "You don't need to tell me if you don't want to."

Tears pricked her eyes. The memories came rushing back all too easily as if waiting for the opportunity to pounce. Shame welled up in her. As much as they had made fun of Potter and his friends, they were brave until the very end. They didn't hesitate to rush into danger, would never act against their moral fibre. The year spent under the Carrows had shown Daphne how weak she was.

"I used an Unforgivable," she admitted.

He drew her closer to him. "Which one?"

"The Cruciatus curse," Daphne said, the words came rushing out of her. "Alecto wanted to make sure that we were loyal to the cause, so she tested us constantly. I couldn't do it. But she threatened Astoria... So I used it."

"Who did you use it on?"

"Longbottom. I had never felt more disgusted or ashamed in my life. To think that I had to hurt someone to protect her. She's my younger sister. What else was I supposed to do?"

Draco lifted her so that she sat on him and cradled her against his chest. For the first time since the war, Daphne fell apart. It was easier to pretend that nothing had happened during the summer. But being back here brought everything to the surface. How could they move on after what had happened? McGonagall had mentioned healing but that seemed impossible.

When her crying slowed, Daphne rested her head against his chest. He smelled like parchment and evergreen. "You did terrible things, Draco. But you had some impossible choices to make. I think we all need to find a way to atone for what we've done."

"I don't think my soul can be saved."

She forced him to look at her. "Under all that bravado and fear, there's a good man. Find him. Find a way to live with what you've done. You have a beautiful soul."

"You don't know what I've done," he whispered.

"I don't," Daphne admits. "But what's done is done. Every day is a new day. We can decide who we want to be. There's still time to change."

There was a look in his eyes that she couldn't place. Her heart was pounding in her chest as she realized how close she was to him. Daphne had always been attracted to him, but she hadn't thought of him as anything more than a friend. Her breath caught in her throat as he leaned in, his lips brushing hers gently before claiming her in a bruising kiss. It was like Draco lit a fire within her as she pulled him closer to her. He had always been off limits, forbidden, but he was here and -

It felt like cold water had been poured over her. Daphne pulled away and scrambled up, backing away from him. "I shouldn't have done that," she muttered. "Pansy is going to kill me."

"I'm not interested in Pansy. I made that clear to her this morning."

"She's my friend."

Draco ran his hand through his hair. "And she's mine. I don't want to hurt her."

"Good. Then we're on the same page. Nothing can happen between us."

"There's something here. I know you can feel it too."

Daphne shook her head. "I can't. I'm sorry."

She fled into the castle, grateful that Draco didn't follow. Her thoughts scattered as she tried to figure out what to do. Daphne couldn't talk to Milicent about it. It wouldn't be fair to put her between her and Pansy. Daphne had to tell her what had happened. The closer she got to the common room, the more certain she felt that it was the only course of action. Secrets didn't remain secrets for long. It would be better if Pansy heard it from her. No matter the consequences.

The blonde squared her shoulders before entering her dorm as if she was going to battle. When she stepped into the dark room, Daphne was relieved to see that her roommates were all asleep. Pansy's face was peaceful, her black hair fanned over her pillow.

Daphne crawled into bed feeling guilty. How could she have betrayed Pansy? Draco was right. They had a moment, one of vulnerability and comfort. He hadn't judged her for the things she had done and it meant more than she could express. But nothing could come of it. Pansy was her best friend. It was that simple.

Sleep was elusive that night.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Pansy's bed was empty by the time Daphne woke up. This was both a great and terrible thing. She was able to delay telling Pansy, but it meant that she still had to deal with the anticipation of such a declaration. Daphne had hoped to corner her at meal times, but the blonde had overslept and missed breakfast. Pansy didn't attend either lunch or dinner.

By the time the end of the day rolled around, Daphne was a giant ball of nerves. Draco had been keen on cornering her alone. It was only thanks to Millicent that she was able to dodge him. Her friend didn't know why she wanted to avoid Draco, but didn't ask any questions.

It wasn't until after dinner that she found Pansy. Daphne was relieved that her best friend was alone. The guilt she had been carrying around all day had threatened to pull her under. Did it make her a bad person to want to unload her burden? She knew that Pansy would be hurt. Not only did Draco not return her feelings, but he had kissed Daphne. It was one of the worst betrayals.

Pansy didn't look up at her entrance, flipping through the pages of Witch Weekly.

"Pans? Can we talk?"

She lifted a delicate brow. "Are you going to tell me why you've been weird lately."

"What do you mean?" Daphne asked. The kiss had happened yesterday night.

"You've been avoiding me. Are you ashamed of me?"

"Of course not. You're one of my closest friends."

Pansy tossed the magazine at the end of her bed and sat up. She had changed out of her robes into something more casual. "Then why did you disappear during the summer? Why are you suddenly supporting the blood traitors?"

Daphne hadn't pictured this when she imagined telling Pansy about Draco. Her questions caught her off guard. She hadn't talked about her beliefs or values. Her whole life it had been a delicate topic. Her mother had cautioned her at an early age to appear neutral. It was like she had known what would happen. It was the approach that Theo had taken as well.

"I disappeared because I was dealing with the same things you were dealing with," Daphne said, taking a seat on her own bed. "I've never had a problem with blood. Sure, muggleborns make me uncomfortable. But do I hate them or wish their demise? No, I don't."

Pansy snapped. "It's convenient to change your tune now that Potter has won."

She sighed. "I know it's not what you want to hear, but it's true. I don't hate anyone."

"You never struck me as a liar."

"I'm not lying. I'm telling you the truth. Didn't you see the damage that hate did to our world? What kind of world do you think we would live in if the Dark Lord won?"

Pansy laughed, as if she couldn't believe what she was hearing. "A world where we are recognized and treated with the respect we deserve. Our families helped shape the Wizarding World, yet everyone's so eager to forget that."

"And you're willing for others to die for this world?"

"Yes. If that's what it takes."

"I don't believe you. I saw you during the battle. You were just as terrified as the rest of us."

"You're wrong."

Daphne stood up and headed to the door. "I know you, Pansy," she said before biting the inside of her cheek. "That's not why I wanted to talk to you. I kissed Draco."

That wasn't the way she had wanted to tell her, but it was out in the world before she realized what she said. The look Pansy gave her felt like a knife to the heart. Pansy was her closest female friend. She would stand by her - had stood by her - in the darkest of times. The raven-haired witch was difficult, but she was steadfast. Her loyalty would put Helga Hufflepuff herself to shame.

"How?"

"You don't want to-"

"How?" Pansy said, her voice cold.

Daphne fiddled with her sleeves. "It was by the lake. We were talking and things just escalated. I stopped as soon as I realized who I was kissing. I never meant to betray you."

"Yet you did it anyway," she said. "It's like I don't even know you anymore."

"I'm still the same person that I've always been."

"That's a lie and you know it. I don't want to see you, I don't want to hear you, I don't want anything to do with you. Is that clear?"

She wanted to protest. Maybe Daphne had been a little too careless with her thoughts as of late. Kissing Draco was a spur of the moment thing, one that she regretted with every fibre of her being. They had shared their dark secrets and it was only natural that the kiss happened. It wasn't her fault that Draco didn't like Pansy.

"Pansy."

"Is that clear?"

She released her breath. "Crystal."

Daphne left their dorm. The tears starting falling the moment she left the common room. Her and Pansy had fought before, but not like this. Never like this. After everything they had been through, she was shocked that Pansy could still cling to the pureblood supremacy beliefs. Daphne hadn't lied. Muggleborns made her uncomfortable. She'd never dealt with any and wasn't looking to. But it didn't mean that she wanted them to die. Did Pansy really want to support a society that ostracized everyone except for wizards?

She was about to reach the kitchens when loud voices made her pause. Peeking around the corner, Daphne could see Potter and Ginny Weasley. Weasley's face was flushed in anger while Potter's fists were clenched. She was about to walk away to give them space, but curiosity had her rooted to the spot.

"It's over, Ginny."

"Why? The war is over. The world is safe now," the witch said. "Don't you remember how good we used to be together?"

He sighed. "Of course I do. You were my light in the darkness."

"Then why can't we be together?"

Daphne's heart broke at how heartbroken Weasley sounded. For a moment, she was jealous. Not of the break up. She had never loved anyone before. Her and Theo had dated back in their fifth year briefly, but it had ended just as quickly as it had begun. Daphne wondered what it was like to be loved and to love so much that you were willing to face the possibility of heartbreak straight on.

"Because I'm not the same person you fell in love with," Potter said. "The war broke me. I died and it changed everything."

"Then let me fix you."

He chuckled darkly. "I don't want to be fixed. Please, just let this go," he said exasperated. "We're never going to get back together."

"You're going to regret this," Weasley promised before storming off.

Daphne was about to leave when his voice startled her. "You can come out now."

There was no point pretending that she wasn't there. The blonde didn't know how Potter knew she had been there, but then again, this was the man that took the Dark Lord down. She turned the corner and walked into the torchlight.

"You again," Potter said. Daphne tried to read his face, but didn't know him well enough. "Why were you eavesdropping?"

"I didn't mean to. I was on my way to the kitchens when I heard you," she admitted.

Potter looked at her. "Are you okay?"

She was confused, but then realized that she hadn't dried her tears before making herself known. "I'm fine. I could ask you the same."

They didn't say anything. This was the most that Daphne had dealt with him and she was surprised that he wasn't as bad as Draco and Pansy made him out to be. Daphne was still wearing her Slytherin robes and he was still being civil. If Draco was to be believed, Potter hated everyone in Slytherin. He seemed to be weighing a decision. Daphne wasn't sure what to do. Should she leave? She had been looking for an escape, a way to avoid both Draco and Pansy.

"Do you want to come to the kitchens with me? It looks like we're both in need of a friend tonight," he said.

Daphne was tempted to say no. Everyone knew that trouble followed Potter around like a shadow. But the war was over, right? The only person she could talk to was Astoria, but the girl hated Pansy and would be thrilled at their disagreement. But was Potter any better?

"Why not," Daphne said before she could stop herself.

He gave her a small smile and walked with her to the kitchen entrance. Potter tickled the pear and ushered her into the warmth. She was always amazed when she came down here to see the elves at work. They must have been in the middle of preparing for tomorrow as they were still at work despite the late hour.

"Winky is happy to be of service," one of the house elves said, approaching them. "What can Winky get you?"

"Any chance I could get my hands on some Firewhisky?" Potter asked sheepishly.

Winky nodded than turned to her expectantly. She weighed her decision for a moment. "Well why not. I'll have some Firewhisky too."

Daphne knew that the house elf was only giving it to her because she was with Potter, but she didn't care. She followed Potter to the table at the far end of the room and was surprised that it was empty. Though curfew was soon and the other students were most likely in their common rooms.

"So they'll let you get away with anything?" Daphne asked to break the awkward silence.

He shrugged. "I'm not sure. I don't usually do this kind of thing."

The firewhisky glasses appeared in front of them with the bottle. Daphne bit her lip as she considered what she was doing. She was about to have a drink with the enemy. Firewhisky wasn't a drink she was familiar with, despite her friends drinking it like water.

"You're welcome to leave at any time," Potter said, taking a swig.

She looked between the door and him. "What the hell. My friends aren't talking to me anyways," Daphne said as she downed her glass.

His green eyes widened. "Maybe you should slow down."

"My family's been drinking this for generations. I'm sure I have a tolerance," Daphne said, waving away his concern.

Potter looked like he wanted to disagree, but held his tongue. They drank in silence. The house elves had all disappeared by the time they had finished half the bottle. Daphne was starting to feel the effects of the alcohol and it brought her peace. She understood why Draco had asked for the drink back on the train. It helped numb the doubts. There was peace, for the first time she could remember.

"Why aren't your friends talking to you?" he asked.

"What?"

"You told me that your friends weren't talking to you. Why?"

Daphne set her glass down. "It's a bit complicated."

"We have all night."

"It's curfew right now."

He chuckled. "That's true. But it is the weekend, so we don't need to worry about classes tomorrow."

"You have a point," she admitted. "Well, to start, I kissed Draco yesterday."

Potter looked uncomfortable. "Congratulations?"

"No, not congratulations. This is the worst thing that could have happened!"

"Why?"

Daphne rolled her eyes. Looking back, she'd blame the Firewhisky for letting her divulge so much to a stranger. "Pansy has been in love with him since we've been in diapers. But he's not interested in her. Draco's been a close friend of mine and we were talking and then suddenly we were kissing and I pretty much ruined my friendship with both of them."

"How did that ruin your friendship with Malfoy?"

"I think he might want to be more than friends."

"And you don't want to be?"

She shook her head. "No. He's a good friend. Nothing more or less."

"Why else aren't they talking to you?" he asked.

"No. I've told you enough for now," Daphne said. "Tell me the real reason why you won't get back together with Weasley."

"You heard the conversation didn't you?"

"I did. But there's more to it. I've told you a little bit, now it's your turn," she smiled playfully. "It's how the game works."

He frowned. "I didn't realize we were playing a game."

"If you're not willing to share, that's fine," Daphne said standing up.

She didn't know what she was doing here. Potter was everything that her friends hated. He had fought against everyone she knew. Daphne never should have followed him into the kitchens. The wizard was impulsive, rash, powerful. But there was something compelling about him. Maybe that's why he was able to lead the Resistance at such a young age. Daphne had been caught up in it for a moment.

Setting her empty glass down, the blonde headed towards the door. It was strange how quiet and eerie the kitchen was without the house elves working. The only light came from the fireplace right in front of the table, casting long shadows. Her hand was on the brass doorknob when his voice stopped her.

"She wants to be with THE Harry Potter," he said quietly. "Ginny had a crush on me before she knew me. Those bloody books they published. And when we were together, I pretended to be the person she wanted me to be. I thought that I could be him. But I can't. And she's not ready to accept that."

Daphne hovered by the door for a moment before taking her seat. "And who were you pretending to be?"

"Someone noble and brave. A hero."

"And you're not?"

"No," he said harshly before changing his tone. "Everyone thinks I'm a hero, but I'm not. I'm just someone that was at the right place at the right time."

She looked at him. "Wasn't there a prophecy that said you had to kill the Dark Lord?"

Her choice of words changed his demeanor. "I almost forgot I was talking to a Slytherin about this."

"That's not fair," Daphne said. "Just because some Slytherins were Death Eaters doesn't mean we all were."

Potter raised a dark eyebrow.

"The Dark Lord recruited from within his house. It only makes sense that there were more Slytherins than other houses," she said. "But Slytherin wasn't the only house to produce Death Eaters. I recall that there were a couple of Gryffindors."

"So which side of the war were you on?" he asked.

"I was neutral."

He rolled his eyes. "There's no such thing. Which side were you on?"

"Neutral," she said firmly.

"How could you possibly be neutral? You realize that we're talking about murder and war here don't you?"

Daphne rose from her seat. "I was neutral. Every adult from my childhood except for a select few, were Death Eaters. They comforted me when I got hurt. Told me lullabies. Protected me. Did I agree with their cause? Of course I didn't."

"So you don't hate muggleborns and muggles?"

"No," she hesitates. "But I don't know enough about them to be comfortable."

Potter poured them both another glass of Firewhisky and gestured for her to sit down. Daphne was tempted to leave. He unsettled her with his piercing green eyes. It was like he was peering into her soul. As much as she tried to convince herself otherwise, Daphne wasn't ready to go. She sat back down.

"People have grand ideas about Harry Potter. They think they know everything about me because they've read about it in the papers or read the books about me. But they have no idea."

The blonde decided to humour him. "Then who are you?"

"That's the thing. I have no idea."

"What do you mean?"

He shrugged. "Exactly that. Everyone's told me who I'm supposed to be. And I tried to be that person my entire life. But now that Riddle is gone, I don't know where that leaves me."

"You make it sound like it's a bad thing he's gone."

"I had a purpose. I hated what he did and everything he stood for. That's why I spent my entire life going against him," Potter said. "But now that he's gone, I don't know what I'm meant to be doing."

The castle was eerily silent. The night sky was pitch black and Daphne knew that curfew had passed long ago. The fire was slowly dying, darkening the room, giving it a more intimate feel.

"None of us know what we're meant to be doing," Daphne admitted.

"Everyone seems to. They have goals, careers they're pursuing. I always wanted to be an auror."

"You don't want to do that anymore?"

He readjusted his glasses. "I'm not sure. Do I really want to spend the rest of my life chasing Dark wizards?"

"And witches."

"And witches," he repeated. "I'm just not really sure of anything anymore."

Daphne took a sip of firewhisky. The burn helped ease her guilt from earlier. "Why don't you take the year to figure it out?"

"What do you mean?"

"Figure out what you like to do. Find what makes you get out of bed in the morning and what you hate with a passion. Do things alone. You're only seventeen. You still have a whole life to live."

"Now you sound like Hermione."

She set the empty glass down. "They don't call her 'The Brightest Witch of Our Age' for no reason."

"I'm surprised to hear you compliment her."

"Me too," Daphne said with a shrug. "I'm feeling a little drunk, so we'll chalk it up to that. I should probably get to bed."

He stands. "Do you want me to walk you back?"

"No, I'll be fine. But I appreciate the offer."

"You still haven't told me the other reason your friends aren't talking to you."

She smiles. "I guess I'll have to tell you another time. Good night Potter."

"Before you leave," he said awkwardly. "If you ever need to talk to a friend, come find me."

"As much as I appreciate the sentiment, I don't think the school would react kindly to that."

Daphne repeated her goodnight and left the kitchen. Her heart hammered in her chest as she snuck back towards the common room. It was crazy how every little noise sounded ominous at night. When she reached the common room, she was surprised to see it occupied.

"Where were you?" Draco asked.

She stayed by the door. "I was- I was with a friend."

"You've been avoiding me."

"Do you blame me?"

He stood up. "I like you, Daphne. You understand me like no one else. You never expect me to be anything other than who I am."

"You know why this can't work."

"Pansy? You're using her as an excuse."

Daphne suddenly wished she hadn't had so much to drink. "Maybe I am. But nothing can happen between us, Draco. You need to figure things out by yourself."

"So that's it? One kiss and you're done with me," he said. "People always said you were cold-hearted, but I never believed them until now."

She shoved him. "And you're an arse, Draco Malfoy."

Daphne was rendered speechless when he kissed her. He wasn't gentle with her. Not this time. He was rough and punishing, pulling her hair as he deepened the kiss. Daphne arched into him, her touch just as punishing as his own. He tasted like firewhisky and forbidden and that just drew her to him all the more.

Her back hit the wall and she sighed contently into him. He trailed kisses down her jaw, down her throat, and she didn't want this to end. His hair was soft between her fingers. She forced his head up and claimed his soft lips with hers. His fingers played with the hem of her shirt. His touch ignited a heat within her, one she'd never felt.

The feeling scared her. Draco sensed the change in her and pulled away, though he kept his arms around her. Daphne didn't blame him. She had a habit of fleeing these days.

"Why do you keep denying this?"

She can't look him in the eyes. "Because it's not right."

"This isn't right?" he said, gesturing to the two of them. "It feels right to me. I think you're scared to admit that you feel it too."

"It can't be right. If it was right, it wouldn't hurt my best friend. As much as it feels right, it feels just as wrong to me too. Maybe that's the draw. Whatever this is, it's forbidden."

Draco leaned his forehead against hers. "And there's no way I can change your mind about this?"

She closed her eyes. There was something comforting about his presence. Daphne wasn't used to being cared for, to have someone that wanted her as much as she did. And she was so tempted to give in. It would be easy. All she had to do was close the space between them.

Because as much as she loved Pansy, she also felt the same for Draco. They were both her closest friends. And in one moment, everything had changed. Any witch would be lucky to be with Draco. He had such a good heart. Yes, he had made some terrible decisions. But instead of hiding away, he was facing his mistakes. People had to give him credit for that, right?

As much as she wanted to be the girl for him, Daphne knew that she wasn't. This was just a passing fancy. Draco wasn't for her. Otherwise, there would be no hesitation on her end. Her heart broke for her friend. He was putting his feelings on the line and she was rejecting him.

"I'm sorry," Daphne said, kissing him softly. "You deserve an excellent witch. I'm just not her."

Draco dropped one of his arms. She was tempted to wrap her arms around his torso, to hug him and to tell him that everything would be okay. But that wasn't her job. She ran her fingers through his hair one last time, kissed his cheek and disappeared into her dorm.


	4. Chapter 4

For the first time since she'd started Hogwarts, Daphne was an outcast. No one knew why her and Pansy had fallen out, only that they had. Theo and Millicent told her that they weren't taking sides. It made sense. The fight was between the two girls and Daphne was in the wrong. But it sure felt like they had taken sides when the blonde had nowhere to sit during meals.

Everyone crowded around Pansy. She drew people in. There was something charismatic and charming in her blunt manner. Daphne had never been like that. She had always been right next to Pansy, in plain sight yet invisible. Millicent looked concerned to see her sitting alone again, but Daphne waved it away. It was the right thing to do. It was the grown up thing to do. Daphne was in the wrong and there were consequences to her actions.

But that didn't mean that it didn't suck.

At least she had Astoria. Her sister smiled as she joined her at the end of the table. The place of outcasts.

"What did you do to piss off her Majesty?" Astoria asked.

Daphne sighed. "I kissed Draco."

"What? And this is the first I'm hearing about it?"

"It's not like I meant for it to happen. We got caught up in the moment."

"That explains why Draco has been staring at you all morning," her sister said with an eye roll.

She resisted the urge to glance his way to see if it was true. He was able to sit with their friends, though at the edge of the friend group. Pansy was angry at them both, but she blamed Daphne. Why were the boys always forgiven and the girls ostracised?

"I'm not interested."

The brunette raised an eyebrow. "He's fit. I'd go for him in a heartbeat."

"He's all yours," Daphne said pushing away her half-eaten plate.

"Want to know who else has been looking your way? Potter."

She laughed. "No. Why would he be staring at me?"

"That's the question, now isn't it?"

"Are you done analyzing my life?" Daphne asked, looking through her bag to make sure she had everything she needed. Was it her or did the textbooks get heavier each year? "What's been going on with you, little duck?"

"Do not call me that," Astoria said, her green eyes flashing.

Daphne reached across the table and pinched her sister's cheeks. "How could I resist? You're so cute."

The bell rang, ruining her fun. For a moment, she had forgotten her worries. She was able to act like an older sister. Even now, her sister pinched her side before taking off for her class. The wave of affection she felt for the brunette made her smile as she walked to her own class. She could hear Pansy's voice getting closer, but tried to ignore it.

Today was going to be a good day.

Daphne made it to Charms with only a few minutes to spare, but saw that Theo had taken her usual spot next to Draco. Blaise was glaring at her, making her aware that she was most definitely not welcome there. Tears pricked her eyes as she tried to figure out where she should sit. She could feel everyone staring at her. Don't cry. Please, don't cry.

"Greengrass, over here," a male voice said from across the room.

She looked up to find Potter gesturing for her to sit with him. Before she could convince herself out of it, the blonde took the offered seat. Daphne didn't want to see Draco's reaction.

"Thanks," she whispered before pulling out her books and quill.

Potter nodded in acknowledgement. He must have noticed that she wanted to be left alone, because he didn't try to engage her in conversation. She was grateful for it. They had talked once while under the influence of alcohol. That didn't make them friends.

"Today, we're going to go over rudimentary healing spells," Professor Flitwick said, drawing the class's attention. "Does anyone know the limitations of healing spells?"

"You can't bring back the dead, nor can you revive dead tissue," Granger answered, sitting next to Weasley.

"Very good, Miss Granger. Ten points to Gryffindor."

His lecture was interrupted by the classroom door swinging open. One of the Hufflepuffs entered the room and took a seat at the back. The purple-haired witch ignored the gazes she drew as she clumsily opened her bag and pulled out her supplies.

"Miss Jones, ten points from Hufflepuff for your tardiness," Professor Flitwick said.

The Hufflepuff shrugged. Daphne suspected that the girl was drunk by the glazed look in her eyes and the way she swayed in her seat. Flitwick frowned but resumed his lecture. Their trunks were inspected before entering Hogwarts. Daphne understood how Potter was able to get his hands on alcohol, but how had this girl?

Daphne's hand ached as she continued jotting down notes. For the first time, she could see the application of this lesson. It would have been handy to know during the war. How many lives could have been saved if they had all known healing spells? She forced her mind to remain on the lecture.

"I want you to read chapter three and to complete the chapter questions by Friday," Professor Flitwick said. "Class dismissed. Miss Jones, please stay behind."

The Hufflepuff jutted her chin out as everyone started trickling out of the classroom. Daphne fastened her bag and was about to join the throng when she felt a hand on her arm.

"Are you okay?" Potter asked.

"Of course. Why wouldn't I be?"

He looked uncomfortable. "Well if you want to sit with me in other classes, you're more than welcome."

"I don't need your pity," Daphne snapped.

"I know. It's not pity," Potter said, readjusting his messenger bag. "I enjoyed our chat the other night. Like I said before, if you ever need a friend, I'm here."

She noddded before disappearing out of the class. Her mind racing a million miles a minute. Potter wanted to be her friend. And he asked her in public. Weasley and Granger had been further back, but watching them with interest. Correction, Granger looked intrigued. Weasley looked annoyed. But everyone knew he hated Slytherins.

As she pushed her way through the crowd to get to her next class, she wanted to smack herself. Potter wanted to be her friend and she nodded. Who does that? Pansy wouldn't have let her live that down if she'd seen it. She was about to turn the corner when she was gently pushed against the wall.

"So Potter?" Draco said.

Daphne removed herself from his grasp. "Who I talk to is none of your business."

"How do you think others will react if you hook up with Potter?"

"Look, he helped me. That's it. And if Potter and I were friends, it doesn't concern you."

"Time for you to leave, blondie. Greengrass has made her point," the purple-haired Hufflepuff said to Draco, hooking her arm through Daphne's. Miss Jones practically dragged her away. "You're in Herbology next right?"

"I am," Daphne answered in a daze. What just happened?

Miss Jones nodded. "Me too."

The two witches walked to the greenhouses and sat at the only free table. It was at the front. Daphne was aware of the stares they drew. The seat next to Theo was empty and he frowned, his gaze drawn to Miss Jones. Her companion didn't seem fazed by the attention.

"What's your name?" Daphne asked.

The purple-haired witch laughed. "Elsie Jones."

"I'm Daphne Greengrass."

"I know."

She bit her lip. "Weren't you drunk earlier?"

"I was," Elsie said with an eye roll. "But Flitwick forced me to drink a sobering potion. That man's a buzzkill."

"But you were drunk during the day?"

"I'm going to say this once: Don't judge me. There's nothing I hate more. Now you seem cool, especially now that you're not hanging around that bitchy girl."

Her comment irked Daphne. "Pansy might not be happy with me right now, but she's still my friend," the blonde said. "I don't need your approval and if that's the condition of being your friend, then I'm not interested."

"I knew I'd like you!" Elsie said with a clap of her hands.

Daphne felt a little unsettled by the girl. Professor Sprout started the class, stopping all conversations. This term, they would learn how to cultivate plants used in healing potions. It seemed like the subjects were on the same page for once. All thoughts of teenage drama fled her mind as she wrote her class notes. Already, she was mentally thinking of the plants she'd have in her garden when she moved out.

When the bell rang, Elsie stopped her before she left. "I know that you snakes like to stick together, but you do have friends in other houses too."

Before Daphne could answer, the purple-haired witch left leaving her with turbulent thoughts.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's Note: I'm not going to lie, I almost stopped posting this story. I've been getting a lot of negative reviews and those voices almost drowned out the people that have been encouraging or have followed/favourited this story. There is a reason that Draco isn't listed, because he's going to be a minor character in the grand scheme of things. This is a slow-burn Daphne/Harry story.
> 
> If you don't like this story, then don't read it.
> 
> And finally, thank you everyone else who's reviewed/commented/favourited/followed this story. You guys keep me going!


	5. Chapter 5

It was the last warm evening until spring and everyone took advantage of it. Friend groups had spread out on the grounds, lying on blankets as the sun began its descent. Daphne had to take a step back as a couple of first years raced past her. Theo gave her a small smile as they searched for a free space to set up.  
He had approached her a couple of days ago, feeling guilty for not checking in with her sooner. Daphne hadn't wanted to accept his apology. Loneliness had been a close friend since her falling out with Pansy. During classes and meals, she watched her friends make memories without her. It stung, realizing they didn't miss her the way she missed them.

Potter and Elsie's offer of friendship had been nice, but they weren't _them_. Daphne had known Pansy, Millicent, Draco, and Theo since they were babies. (Blaise had moved to England when they were kids.) Every moment of her life had been shared with them. Of course, they had all fought before but it had never been like this. It's like Pansy had won their friends in a divorce, leaving Daphne to rebuild anew. The blonde enjoyed Elsie's company, but they didn't have inside jokes. They hardly knew each other.

She missed Theo. That's why she had accepted his apology and offer to spend time catching up. Once the blanket was spread out, Daphne took off her shoes and sat down. Theo followed suit and they were stuck sitting in awkward silence. She wanted to ask how everyone was doing but wasn't sure if that was appropriate or if she even wanted to know.

"How have you been?" he finally asked.

Daphne sighed. "I've been managing. You?"

"Still dealing with Ministry shit."

"What's going on now?"

"They're still refusing to give me back possession of the manor. I told them they could burn the place down for all I cared if they paid me for it. You can imagine how well that went," he said dryly.

She sighed. "I'm lucky that I don't have to deal with that. Mother's been handling it all. Are the accounts still frozen?"

"Everything but my personal account. I'll be out of money by the end of the year if they haven't finished their investigations by then."

"That's awful."

"I don't care about the money," Theo said, watching the light show some third years were putting on a couple of blankets away. "My mother's things are in the vaults and the house. It's all I have of her. I don't know what I would do if I didn't have anything left of her."

Daphne pulled her friend into a hug. It was a little awkward because they were sitting, but she didn't care. She held onto her skinny friend before ruffling his hair. "You'll get her things back. Maybe not the money but that's what jobs are for, right?"

"I've missed you. Things aren't the same without you. There's no one to lighten the atmosphere between Draco's sulking and Pansy's bitchiness."

"I miss you guys too. If I could take back the kiss, I would."

Girls giggled somewhere behind her. Theo readjusted his black frames. "I don't think it's the kiss."

"What do you mean?"

"You've made it pretty clear that you don't return Draco's feelings. Pans would have come around by now," he said, sitting up straighter. Theo seemed to wrestle with how much to divulge. "She thinks you're a blood traitor."

His words sent a chill down her spine. Daphne wasn't a blood traitor. If she was, she'd be like Weasley or Longbottom. Though the more she thought about it, the more she questioned it. Again, Daphne didn't want to mingle with muggles. But that didn't mean she wanted them dead. She would describe herself as tolerant. Did that make her a blood traitor?

The sound of an explosion jarred her from her thoughts. Daphne scrambled to her feet, fingers trembling as she pulled out her wand. The sky was lit up in green and she could feel her panic rising as her heart pounded. Her vision blurred as memories of the war overwhelmed her. Someone was talking to her, but it sounded so far away. Fear clawed at her throat as her wand was wrenched from her grasp. A scream brought her back to the present. She felt like she was waking up from a nightmare. Her mind was groggy and her damp clothes clung to her.

"You're safe," a male voice said. It didn't sound like Theo, but her mind was too foggy to tell who it was. "Focus on the sound of my voice. Can you feel my hand on your back?"

Daphne nodded but kept her eyes shut as the panic still threatened to overwhelm her. She had trouble calming her racing pulse and it was a struggle to breathe properly.

"I'm going to take your hand. What can you feel?"

It was soft and cold. She could feel the dirt under her nails. "G-grass."

"Perfect. What about now?"

Something heavy and cold was placed in her palm. "A rock? Or a pebble?"

"You got it," the voice said calmly. "Daphne, you're safe. Can you open your eyes for me?"

The panic was still there, thrumming under her skin as if waiting for the opportunity to strike again. But she could hear the sound of activity and angry voices around her. Daphne slowly opened her eyes and felt something in her crack when met Potter's concerned gaze. It seemed like he was always catching her at her weakest moments. A hot ball of shame burrowed into her chest.

"Where's Theo?"

Potter looked uncomfortable. "I noticed that you needed help and came over. I started talking to you and when I turned around, he was gone."

"What happened? And how did you know what to do?"

"You had a panic attack," he said, rubbing the back of his neck, "I've had my fair share of them. Hermione gave me some tools to use on how to deal with them."

Her attention was drawn to Granger and Finnegan. They were in the middle of a row, their angry voices getting louder.

"It was just a couple of fireworks. Don't get your knickers in a twist!" Finnegan said, red-faced.

"You're an idiot!" Granger yelled, her hair sparking in anger. "We've all been through a war. What did you think you'd accomplish setting off a loud noise? And did the fireworks _have_ to be green?"

"It's a green dragon. We were all having a good time and I thought people would enjoy it. Clearly, Ron hasn't removed that broom from your arse," he said storming off.

Daphne shivered as the autumn wind cut through her damp clothes. Potter removed his cloak and handed it to her. "Don't argue. You've been through an ordeal tonight and you don't need to get sick on top of it."

"This is why people think you're a hero. Rescuing damsels and giving them your cloak," she said, wrapping his warm cloak around her.

Granger strode up to them in a huff. "Can you believe Seamus? Let's set off fireworks that people could mistake for Voldemort's mark!" she said taking a seat next to Potter. When Granger looked up, she realized Daphne was there. "Are you okay?"

"Fine."

"Honestly, everyone should have mandatory counselling. I don't think there's a person here that doesn't suffer from panic attacks or some other form of PTSD," Granger said.

Potter didn't say anything for a moment. "Maybe that's something we should do."

"What are you talking about?" the frizzy-haired witch asked.

"We should bring in a counsellor or something to work with everyone. We'd probably need more than one actually," he said, his eyes sparkling at the idea. "I know that I'd benefit from it. We'd just need a way for the school to allow it."

The duo had been so caught up in their conversation, it was like they had forgotten all about Daphne. She wasn't sure what they were talking about. It was strange sitting here with the two of them. They were both war heroes, Gryffindors, accomplished. They had been the enemy growing up. Yet, they talked as if they trusted her.

"What's a counsellor? Or rather, what do they counsel?" Daphne asked.

Granger opened her mouth to answer, but Potter beat her to it. "It's like a healer but for your mind. You talk to them and they help you sort things out."

"It's also called therapy. My parents went to a marriage counsellor when they were having some issues. The therapist helped them get to the root of their problems and taught them how to communicate with each other better," Granger added.

"These therapists could help with all this?" the blonde asked, referring to the post-war trauma.

She laughed. "Well, I certainly think we'd have a better shot at healing from the war with help, rather than dealing with it on our own."

"The problem is finding a way to bring it to school. There's nothing like this in the wizarding world?" Potter asked.

"It's frowned upon to talk about your problems," Daphne said, stifling a yawn. "They might go for it if Potter suggests it. You're the hero of the wizarding world after all. Talk to Professor McGonagall and set up a meeting with the board of directors. And if they don't support your plan, go to the press."

Granger stiffened. "Why does Harry have to do it?"

"Because he defeated the Dark Lord. Everything is chaotic right now. They'll look to him for guidance." And you're a female and a mudblood, so anything you'd present would get rejected, Daphne added mentally. The board of directors were both men and traditionalists.

"I'm sure you mean well, but I don't think you know enough about this to give us advice," Granger said standing up. "I'm going to look for Ron. Are you coming?"

Harry shook his head. "I'll catch up later."

The brunette didn't look pleased with his answer and stalked away. This was the first interaction she'd had with Granger. She was just as intense as Daphne had expected. All opinions and fire. She brought out an interesting side of Potter. He had always been cool and collected when he talked to Daphne. This discussion had brought out a passionate side to him. She saw the leader that people had been willing to follow in the war.

When she yawned, Potter suggested they go inside the castle. Daphne had expected to part ways once they reached the main entrance, but he escorted her to the Slytherin common room. They stopped just around the corner of the entrance.

"I would have been perfectly fine to walk on my own."

The corridors were quiet. Their voices were louder than usual in the silence. "People are restless, grieving, angry. I think we should all be on our guard at night and when travelling alone," he said.

"Thanks for the warning," she said, turning to leave.

"My name's Harry by the way."

Daphne turned back. "Old habits are hard to break, but I'll try," she said. "Thank you for helping me earlier. I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't."

"You would have gotten through it. But it's always easier when you have a friend with you," Potter said.

"Well, thank you, Harry," she said, the name sounding foreign on her tongue.

He looked like he wanted to say more, but he ended up taking a step back. "Have a good night, Daphne."

Daphne smiled before disappearing through the common room door. She knew without turning around that he waited for her to enter before walking to his own dorm.

Her common room was empty. She ignored her disappointment that Theo hadn't been waiting for her. Their conversation before the fireworks put her ill at ease. Was she a blood traitor? Did it even matter now that the war was over?

It wasn't until she reached her bed that she realized she still had P-Harry's cloak on. Making sure her roommates were all asleep, Daphne pulled the cloak tightly around her. It smelled distinctly like him if you could bottle up the essence that made Harry Potter. The smell of cedar, with a hint of spice, conjured up memories of their first meeting, drinking in the kitchens, and his patience as he helped her through her panic attack. He barely knew her, yet he went out of his way to make sure she was okay. The blonde knew how many girls would kill to be in her position. Daphne had been wary of P-Harry. Her friends had been at odds with him since their first year. Maybe she should give him a chance. It didn't look like her friends were going to forgive her anytime soon.

Daphne took off his cloak. Folding it carefully, she put it at the bottom of her trunk. She wouldn't hear the end of it if anyone caught her with it. The rumour mill would also go crazy if they saw her give it to him. She would hang onto it until she could give it back to him without everyone watching. As she showered and washed away the grime of the day, she wished that she could wash away the memories of the war just as easily. Daphne hoped that P-Harry was successful in getting those counsellors to come to Hogwarts. They could all use a little help.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's Note: There are no words to express how grateful I am for your support. My heart is so full from all the encouraging reviews, comments, and messages. I've saved them to read over if/when I experience negative reviews in the future. You've reminded me how amazing this community is.
> 
> Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.


	6. Chapter 6

By the time October rolled around, a routine was established among the students. Though the absence of their deceased classmates was still felt, new friend groups had started to form. Living at Hogwarts continued to be difficult. But it was getting a little bit better with time. The panic attacks amongst the students weren’t happening as often as during the start of term. Maybe their bodies were too exhausted.

Daphne spent her meals with Astoria and sat with Harry and Elsie in classes. She varied her free time between them, feeling like a charity case. They had their own friend groups. Harry, Ron, and Hermione remained inseparable. Ron and Hermione were civil to her, but they didn’t care for her presence. It was obvious in their reluctance to extend invitations to her when she was sitting with them. The Hufflepuff seventh years were a tight-knit bunch that were wary of outsiders. Elsie had invited her to spend time in their common room once. It hadn’t gone well and they both agreed never to do that again. The friendliness of Helga’s house was just another war casualty.

The blonde knew that the fragile peace wouldn’t last. Tension hung in the air and it was only a matter of time before someone snapped. Daphne’s money had been on the Slytherins or the Hufflepuffs. All it would take was another harmless firework to disturb the status quo. Little did she know that she would be present when it happened. Something that was so little, but would have lasting effects.

Daphne joined Harry in the library and wasn’t surprised to see his friends sitting with him. But when she walked up, she noticed that the group seemed on edge. Harry stared resolutely at his textbook, while Hermione kept shooting him glances. This seemed to only aggravate Ron.

“Is this a bad time?” Daphne asked taking her usual seat across from Harry.

“Ye-” Hermione started.

Harry interrupted her. “No.”

The vehemence in his voice surprised her. Daphne searched his face, hoping to find the answers. Despite spending time with them, she was still very much an outsider. They seemed to have the ability to communicate without talking, each knowing what the other needed instinctively. It made sense. How many times had they gone through life-threatening adventures together? Daphne envied that ability. It reminded her of her old friends.

They had worked silently for ten minutes before the tension finally snapped.

“Harry, you should really think-” the witch beside her started.

“No,” he snapped. “I have done my part. I fucking died. I almost lost everyone.”

“I know, but-”

“You don’t know. If you did, you wouldn’t ask.”

The redhead’s ears went red. “Don’t talk to her like that. You know she’s right. We’ve all suffered in the war,” Ron said, speaking over Harry’s attempted interruption, “But it’s not over. Look around. It’s chaos. We need someone to lead us and everyone’s looking to you, mate.”

“I don’t want it. I never did. I thought you two would understand,” Harry said, shoving his things in his bag and storming out of the library.

Daphne watched him go. This was the first time she’s seen discord among the best friends. Was she supposed to follow him? The other two didn’t appear to notice that she was still here in their frustration.

“Maybe we should have waited,” Hermione said finally.

Ron glared. “Why? Harry’s not a child. We’ve given him enough time. Everyone’s lost someone.”

“He’s already given so much,” she admitted.

“And we haven’t? We’ve been with him every step of the way,” the redhead said. “There’s a huge power vacuum and if we’re not careful, we’ll have another Tom Riddle or Lucius Malfoy take advantage of it.”

Daphne frowned. “Why does Harry have to be the one to do it?”

“It’s always him, isn’t it?” Ron answered. She thought she detected a hint of venom in his voice, but she couldn’t be sure.

“Do you mind talking to him? He’s not going to want to talk to either of us,” Hermione said.  
Ron huffed. “You’re always so bloody concerned about Harry. It makes me wonder why you’re not dating him.”

The blonde took that as her cue to leave. Hermione’s eyes watered and Daphne hurried away. Everyone knew how explosive Ron and Hermione’s fights were. Madam Pince stormed past her towards their table. Relieved that she escaped, she started her search for Harry. She wasn’t sure how she had gotten roped into this situation. She had only dealt with Harry in a good mood. The version she saw this afternoon was unfamiliar.

She wasn’t sure what the fight was about. What did they expect Harry to do? Be Minister of Magic? Had he gotten an offer for a position of power? Did they want him to go to the press? Make a stand like Ron had done at the start of term?

It took her over an hour and an almost run-in with Pansy before she found him. Harry was sitting in the stands of the Quidditch Pitch, sitting alone in the light rain. Raising her hood over her hair, Daphne sat next to him.

After performing a warming and rain-repelling charm, the blonde waited for him to make the first move. She didn’t know what to say. Her mouth opened several times as she started and stopped herself from saying the wrong thing. Even with his sullen look, her heart raced with his close proximity.

“You should go. I’m not in a good headspace right now,” Harry said suddenly.

She bit her lip. “What kind of friend would I be if I left?”

“I’m asking you to go. I’m not at my best.”

“You don’t need to be at your best to deserve my friendship. We can’t always be happy and positive.”  
Harry took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes before putting them back on. Had his green eyes always been so bright? His eyelashes would make any girl jealous.

“I hurt people closest to me. They either die or I lash out. It’s better for you to go.”

“Then don’t lash out?” She said, feeling nervous. “Why don’t you tell me what caused the fight?”

They were on fragile ground. He reminded her of Pansy in this moment. Her best friend had so many walls and it took a lot to get through her tests. Daphne realized that the Harry she had known so far was only a small piece of him. He had been hurt. She understood Ginny Weasley’s desire to fix him. Daphne felt that same protective emotion well up within her, but she clamped it down. You couldn’t fix people. They had to sort it out themselves. It was a lesson that she had learned the hard way.

“The Ministry wants me to leave Hogwarts to work for them or take on a leadership position at Hogwarts,”

Harry explained, sounding bitter. “I haven’t done anything to earn it. I didn’t think I’d survive the war. Those moments where I imagined a future where I did, I was living a life that I chose. But other people want to pressure me to do what they want.”

“Did you explain that to your friends?”

He looked away, running a hand through his messy hair. “It’s complicated.”

“Why do you think you don’t deserve it?”

“Because there’s nothing special about me. I’m just a boy whose parents were killed and a megalomaniac decided that I was the key to his downfall. I don’t have any special powers. Hermione’s a million times smarter than me.”

Daphne hid her surprise. Is that really how he saw himself? “Then why did you fight him? Why were you one of the key players in the war?”

He didn’t answer and she was scared that she misspoke. There was so much she didn’t know, context she didn’t have. How could he not realize how special he was? That people were drawn to him like a moth to flame? That he had survived things that would have destroyed other people and most days, he was still willing to see the positive side of things?

“I couldn’t stand back while my friends were in danger. I tried to avoid it, but everyone was so keen on pushing me to the front of everything that it was easier to just go with it.”

“You’ve done more than you realize, Harry.”

He chuckled darkly. “I killed Riddle. That makes a murderer, not a hero.”

“It’s not about the big things that everyone always talks about, though that’s pretty incredible in itself,” Daphne explained. “You can’t stop yourself from helping others. You helped me during my panic attack, offered me your friendship when my friends turned their backs on me. I’ve seen you defend the younger students from bullies.”

“Anyone would do that.”

“No, they really wouldn’t. It’s easier to do nothing. Sitting with someone who’s grieving or having a panic attack is harder. I’ve learned that people will always do what’s easier.”

“Now you sound like Dumbledore.”

She playfully shoved him. “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do.”

“Try telling that to Ron and Hermione.”

“I’m not sure what’s going on between you three, but you’ll figure it out.”

Her warming charm had worn off and the cold seeped through her cloak. She didn’t want to ruin the mood by pulling out her wand and recasting the spell. Harry had thought he would repel her but she preferred this side to him. This Harry was real. Human.

“I think that you’ll be great at whatever you decide to do,” Daphne said when he didn’t answer. “But you’ve given the world enough. Do what you want to do. What lights you up. The wizarding world had problems long before you were born and it’ll have problems long after we’re gone. It’s not up to you to fix everything.”

When Harry didn’t respond, Daphne feared the worst. Did she overstep? Had she been too honest? The warming charm had dissipated and the rain had drenched her hair long ago. She knew that if they stayed out here much longer they’d get sick. Harry seemed to have similar thoughts.

“Let’s go inside. I think I’ll be alright now,” he said, helping her up.

Daphne followed him back towards the school. She was usually pretty good at reading people, but she had no idea what was going through his mind right now. He paused right outside the main doors and turned to her. She searched his face again for answers but came up empty.

“Thank you for staying with me. People aren’t often on my side,” he said looking at the ground. “I think I need to be alone right now.”

Her heart plummeted as she realized she had messed up. When had she misstepped? Daphne racked her mind trying to determine where she had gone wrong. She had begun to care about the man in front of her. Her life would be poorer without him in it. Before the blonde could register what he was doing, Harry grabbed her hand and squeezed it before disappearing inside the castle.

She cradled her hand against her chest and couldn’t help the small smile on her face. Closing her eyes, Daphne could still feel his warm, calloused hand in hers. Maybe she hadn’t messed up after all. She grinned as she walked into the castle, feeling lighter than she had in months.

#

“Merlin, is it that time already?” Daphne asked when she glanced at the clock. “I should have been back to the common room by now.”

Elsie looked up. “It’s not even close to curfew yet.”

“I just hate walking in the dungeons at night. I should head back.”

Daphne quickly packed up her things. She was being silly, but Harry’s warning at the start of term stuck with her. It was common knowledge that Slytherins were targets in the halls. People pretended not to notice. They probably told themselves that the Dark Lord’s former house deserved it. Some did. But the younger years did not. Harry and Hermione were the only one that went out of their way to protect the younger Slytherins. But they couldn’t be everywhere at once.

The purple-haired witch frowned. “Is everything okay?”

“It’s fine. I’m just a bit jumpy tonight.”

“You would tell me if something was wrong, right?”

Daphne smiled. “Of course I would. It’s been a long day and the shadows creep me out. That’s all.”  
The lie came too easily to her lips. It wasn’t that she wanted to hide the truth from Elsie, but Slytherin habits and secrecy were hard to break. Daphne said goodbye to her friend and left the comfort of the library. The long trek to her common room wasn’t something she was looking forward to. Why did they have to be in the dungeons? It was so far away from everything.

The corridors were empty. The flickering torches made it seem like things were moving out of the corner of her eye, but each time she looked, the hallway was empty. She grabbed her wand, hiding it so that she wasn’t immediately disarmed if she came upon an attacker. Daphne knew she was being silly. The war was over. No one would attack her.

Her nerves had finally settled when she heard a strange noise. Her grip on her wand tightened. She was almost at the entrance of her common room. It was probably a rat. Daphne had just convinced herself of that when she heard the sound of voices further down the hallway. She would’ve ignored it all together. But she recognized one of the voices.

Swallowing the lump in her throat, Daphne inched forward until she was right around the corner. There were two male students threatening a Slytherin.

“I don’t even now how you show your face around here,” one of them said to her housemate. “No one’s forgotten that you wanted to turn Harry over to Voldemort.”

“How does it feel losing the war?” the other taunted.

Pansy sounded angry, but there was a hint of fear in her voice. “I don’t have to explain myself to you.”  
She tried to leave, but was forced back against the wall. “I don’t think you understand how this works. You’ve gotten off lightly. Too lightly.”

“So we’ve taken it upon ourselves to punish those who got off scot-free.”

The common room was only a step away. All Daphne had to do was turn around and pretend she had never heard the commotion. No one would know. She was only a witch. There were two of them. The odds weren’t in her favour. Interfering would only mean they’d target her next. She took a step towards the entrance before sighing and moving towards Pansy. The conversation she’d had with Harry about people preferring the easier choice came rushing back. He would’ve interfered without hesitation. Gripping her wand with her sweaty hand, she pointed it at both of them.

“Expelliarmus!” she said, catching the three wands that came flying towards her. They must’ve disarmed Pansy earlier.

When they faced her, Daphne was surprised to recognize them. Michael Corner and Wayne Hopkins. She didn’t know either of them. They had attended some classes together, though she struggled to remember which. Pansy refused to meet her yes. Daphne wanted to roll her eyes at the girl, but the two wizards advancing on her stole her attention.

“Why don’t we all part ways? Pretend this didn’t happen?” Daphne asked backing up.

“You’re no better than her,” Corner said. “I don’t know how Harry hasn’t seen past your lies yet.”  
Fear clawed at her throat as they continued to advance on her. She wanted to defend herself, but how could she? She had done awful things under the Carrows. Things that Harry didn’t know. Daphne realized that she would lose his friendship once he found out. Who had she been trying to fool? She couldn’t take back the past. It would forever lurk in the shadows.

“ _Colloshoo_!” Daphne said in a rush, giving her wand a little half swirl.

The boys stumbled as their shoes stuck to the ground. Pansy wasted no time running towards Daphne.  
“I don’t want to cause any harm,” Daphne said placing Corner and Hopkins’ wands on the ground a few feet away.

The girls hurried into their common rooms and breathed a sign of relief when the door shut behind them. Daphne was dazed. The adrenaline made it difficult to think clearly. It seemed impossible that Corner and Hopkins had been the ones targeting Slytherins. The war was over. Didn’t they want peace? Hadn’t Corner been in Harry’s defence group?

“Colloshoo? Of all the spells you could use…” Pansy trailed off, still sounding breathless.

Daphne grinned. “It did the trick didn’t it? It was the first thing that popped into my head.”

They both shared a laugh before the memories of the past month returned to them. The girls stiffened and Daphne gave Pansy back her wand. There was so much she wanted to say to the raven-haired girl. She felt like she was reaching out, waiting to see if Pansy would accept her. But coldness replaced the warmth in her sapphire eyes and Daphne knew that their friendship had been forever altered. The implicit trust was gone.

“Thanks for your help,” Pansy said straightening her uniform. “But this changes nothing between us.”

Daphne scoffed. “So that it’s then? We’re going to throw away more than a decade’s worth of friendship? Over a boy?”

“Draco is more than a boy. And it’s not even about that anymore. I don’t even know who you are.”  
“I’m still the same person I’ve always been.”

Pansy shook her head. “You’re hanging out with halfbloods and mudbloods. See, I can’t even say the word without you flinching. You’re turning your back on everything we were taught.”

“Maybe it was all wrong! Have you ever considered that?”

“You’re only saying that because you’re in love with Potter.”

Daphne took a step back. “I’m not in love with him. He’s my friend.”

“You’re an idiot. Anyone can see the way you two act around each other. He’s the enemy. He’s responsible for all the shit that went wrong in our lives!”

“No, he’s not. He’s just a boy who was placed in a terrible, impossible situation. Why can’t you accept that we were wrong?”

“We weren’t wrong! Halfbloods and mudbloods are dangerous. There’s a reason our worlds are separate, but they’re so eager to destroy the Statute of Secrecy and put us all at risk.”

“Pansy, I know you’re scared-”

Her eyes flashed. “I’m not scared. You’re delusional.”

Before Daphne could stop her, Pansy disappeared into the dorms. She wanted to follow, but knew that the raven-haired witch would probably curse her. She collapsed onto the leather couch. Maybe Pansy was right. Daphne was changing. But wasn’t that a good thing? Weren’t you supposed to learn and grow? It seemed better than to be stuck in your ways and bitter with the world.

She knew Pansy better than anyone. Her friend didn’t actually hate halfbloods and muggleborns. Pansy had shared her disgust when the Carrows were at school. But blood purity was something they knew. The importance of tradition and the tragedy of the witch burnings was drilled into them since childhood. Ron was right. Everyone was lost in this post-war world. Clinging to the familiar was more comfortable than stepping into the unknown. Blood purity would become irrelevant - if things moved in the right direction - and that would change the pureblood traditions. It made her head hurt thinking of everything they were facing.

They were all struggling in this post-war world. Only time would tell if they’d be plunged into yet another war or if there’d finally be peace.


End file.
